I Miss You
by Spanish-Senpai
Summary: Basically this is a story where the Doctor really misses Rose and writes her a letter. Sorry if I'm wrong about time and space and all that jaz. I might make some edits to this later, but until then please read and review, because I appreciate it so much when you do!


**Hello everyone! It's me again.**

 **Now I know that I'm supposed to be working on other stories right now, (mainly Crystal and Ice) but I realized that I really love Doctor Who and I wanted to wright my own story to go in the big collection. I felt I wouldn't be a true Whovian if I didn't.**

 **So yeah on with the story!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Doctor Who.**

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The Doctor was alone and lonely sitting in his TARDIS with no companion asking questions about the universe. This wasn't unusual since he hadn't found another companion since the day he had lost Rose, but today he really felt that loneliness. It was just a random burst of emotion. One second he had been fine and then he had let a thought of Rose slip into his mind. Suddenly everything reminded him of Rose and thoughts of Rose soon turned into thoughts of what he could have done to save her and have her with him today.

At the moment he was sitting against the wall with his knees to his chest and his eyes clenched painfully shut in an attempt to not cry. He made a sad choked noise from the back of his throat. His companions, especially Rose, had always warned him that keeping his emotions bottled up like he did would lead to a massive breakdown; and with his luck no one would be there to help him through it.

He felt his eyes growing wet. Putting the heels of his hands to his eyes, he whispered over and over again, "Why, why, why?" Why was the universe so cruel to him? Why hadn't fate let Rose stay with him? Why did everything he care about get taken away in the end?

"WHY?!" he suddenly shouted.

There was no response other than the lonely echo of his voice through the TARDIS. Finally he let the tears fall. He couldn't keep doing this. He couldn't let himself slowly fall apart. The Doctor couldn't let himself think that everything was hopeless without Rose. These feelings felt worse than any physical blow, and The Doctor knew that he would have to do what his past companions, what _Rose,_ had told him to do in times like these.

He stood up shakily and went to the TARDIS library. He sat at his desk and pulled out a piece of paper and a pencil. With tears still dripping down his face he began to write.

 _Dear Rose,_

 _I miss you so much. I decided to try the writing down my emotions thing that you told me to do. It may not be exactly what you had in mind, but I feel like you would have been the only one who could listen and understand and since you're not here anymore this was the closest thing I had._

 _I've been trying to hold down my emotions and move on like you would have wanted me to, but I can't._

 _Everything has lost some of it's splendor without you here. You made so many horrible things seem okay._

 _But now your gone. You've got the Metacrisis Doctor with you, but I don't have a copy of you. And even if I could, even if I wanted to, you can't copy something as beautiful and wonderful as you._

 _There are so many places I wish I could have taken you, and so many things that I wish I could have said._

 _The biggest would have been I love you._ _I regret not saying that when I last saw you._

 _Everything in the TARDIS reminds me of you. Sometimes when its quiet enough I can imagine that your still sitting in the room with me. I can almost see you and your bright smiling face._

 _I'm sorry to say that I haven't gotten a new companion, but in all honesty, which is rare for me, I couldn't handle losing someone else I care about._

He paused for a moment. Staring at the now tear stained paper reading over what he had written and feeling slightly silly with himself since this wasn't going to reach Rose. But also feeling a bit better, this was actually working.

 _Rose I'm so lonely._

 _Once I opened the doors to the TARDIS and looked at the vortex. The colors and the depths of all of time reminded me of your eyes. Your glorious eyes that showed so much love and care and knowledge that I had yet to discover in the beginning._

 _One day Rose I wish that I will be able to see you again. You and those fantastic eyes._

 _My pink and yellow human._ _My Bad Wolf Girl._ _My love._

 _I miss you._

He stopped writing then because there was nothing left to say. The tears had stopped and the sorrow in his mind seemed as though it had dissipated some. In a way he felt lighter, like a weight had been lifted off his chest. The pain and loneliness were still there, but now they were bearable.

The Doctor looked at the letter on the desk and carefully folded it. he found an envelope and put the letter inside, writing _To Rose_ on the outside. He walked to the doors of the TARDIS and opened them to the vortex. The many swirling colors of time and space whizzed past him.

He held out the letter and with one last look, let it go. He watched it fly away, and vaguely hoped that it would find it's way to Rose. But even if it didn't at least writing to her hand almost felt as if he would see her soon, that she had only gone away for a little while.

He smiled sadly to himself, deciding he could comfort himself with the idea that he would see her again one day.

" _I love you_ ," he whispered, before he closed the TARDIS doors.

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 **And there we go! I'm sorry if this isn't how you think the Doctor would deal with sadness, but it's how I deal with it, so I wrote what was easiest for me.**

 **Please review! All feedback is appreciated.**

 **Bye now!**


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